Yes, to help is to understand.
Trouble is, most people who never have depression,
How could they ? They are used to the
cause and effect of the situation and reaction.
from a death, heartbreak from a divorce, stress from overwork,
upset over a heart attack, anger over an injustice - those
are real feelings with real reasons - that most people
would understand, right ?
about the positive side ? Falling in love - that's a
real feeling, right ? Happy when good things happen,
sad when bad things happen - simple, right ?
Depression - not so simple. Sad for
good things, sad for bad things, sad for no reason at all... Sure
we might assign one of the many problems in our lives as the reason or a reason for our depression. Truth
is - it probably isn't really the reason.
Depression is the reason.
Without treatment, Depression can go on
and on - without treatment maybe we never really get
Unless you recognize the need for help and
decide today to get it, you are prolonging your own misery
as well as for everyone around you.
Depression is wearing on those who don't understand.
Depression is scary
It makes those who live with you or
depend on you feel afraid, insecure, unsure of the future.
They don't know what is going to happen. Everything
is on hold, life cannot go forward.
They can be impatient, frustrated, angry -
with you, with depression, with themselves, adding unintended
If you are not actively seeking and getting
treatment - they see no end to it either.
People just don't always know how to help,
what to say, what to do, or how to act around depression.
Even under normal circumstances, it isn't
always easy to express emotions.
People are afraid that talking about it will
upset you more. They are afraid, period - of themselves
and of you - sort of a fear of the unknown.
Just because we are not well, does
not mean that our loved ones will suddenly become expert caregivers.
Expecting too much from others will only bring
on more depression, sadness, disappointment, pain and/or anger.
They don't get it - how can they, unless they
have it too. And then, maybe they don't have the capacity
to help because they are depressed too.
For your own sake, you must forgive them for
not knowing what you are going through or how to help you.
Maybe life is already about as stressful as
they can handle and they can't be what you need them to be.
we even know what will make us feel better anyway ?
talking about how you feel will help, if they will listen. Sometimes just knowing they love you and care about
your life is helpful. Sometimes just passing
the time together is important. Sometimes nothing
can be said or done that will help at all. Just waiting.
As a depressed and suicidal person you should
think of yourself like someone who is experiencing
a serious health crisis or personal tragedy - such as a heart
attack, a car accident, a divorce, or the death of a loved
Think of yourself this way:
- You are sick, you are hurt
- Expect to get treatment
- Expect to suffer for a while longer
- Expect to get better